Escaping from an abusive relationship often involves multiple attempts. In fact globally, 7 attempts are widely quoted as the average number of times women attempt to leave an abusive relationship. But an ‘attempt’ to leave doesn’t necessarily involve physically leaving your home or asking your partner to move out. It also includes moments when you declare a particular behaviour or comment is unacceptable.

Whether intentional or not, abusers ‘groom’ their partners. During this process, potential victims identify boundaries that can’t be crossed. As a result, both the potential victim and the abuser learn what she will and won’t tolerate. When this happens it’s like an attempt to leave. 

Promises are made but …

After each of these boundary forming encounters, abusers may make promises of change and the change may occur. But over time, these behaviours can resurface or other types of abuse may begin. 

The purpose of Escape to Better Foundation is to help people sustainably escape domestic violence and intimate partner abuse. This involves identifying the early or more subtle forms of abuse such as emotional abuse and control. Because the more times you return to an abusive relationship, the more likely it is that the control will increase. This will make it much harder for you to leave. 

Does this sound like you or someone you know?

If you are looking for completely confidential support and guidance, visit Escape to Better Foundation. Please share this blog so others can find the help they need.